Tuesday, October 20, 2009

Let's Get Honest

Reading from John 4

In the times that Jesus was here on earth there were few opportunities for men to speak with women in a public place. It was not part of their culture. Men and women were pretty much segregated. It was not proper for a man to address a woman, and forbidden by culture for a woman to speak to a man. It was just not done.

For a Jew to speak to a Samaritan, unheard of. And for a Rabbi to speak to a woman, well, it just didn't happen. In that culture, women were not to speak in public or to even voice an opinion. At home they were allowed, but not in public. So for Jesus to speak to this woman in a public place was very much out of the ordinary. I'm sure she was surprised. Yet He opened the conversation with asking for a drink.

"...Sir, give me this water so that I won't get thirsty and have to keep coming here to draw water."

And then He dropped the bomb shell:

"Go call your husband and come back."

And she said, "I have no husband."

Jesus said to her, "You are right when you say you have no husband. The fact is, you have had five husbands, and the man you now have is not your husband. What you have just said is quite true."

Let's stop here and look closely at this dialogue. In the beginning it appears that Jesus doesn't know about her marital status, but in reality He was waiting for her honesty. Let's disregard the nature of this subject matter; women and marriage and divorce etc.

Let's look at this conversation for what it is. This could be a man He was  speaking to. It could be a young person that just stole a car, and He asks for a ride. This subject is about being honest with yourself before God and admitting our failures, problems, shortcomings, and yes, admitting our sin.

I don't want us to get caught up in the subject matter. Divorce happens; disappointment, adultery, inability to communicate that ends in "falling out of love" happens. I'm not saying that it's the best way. But sometimes it happens. God says he hates divorce. It doesn't say He hates those involved. He hates it because it tears people apart, and families suffer.

You know the church signs, out front, where they have some little saying that's pithy and or a double meaning? Cute and clever to get your attention?
Well, last week we saw one that said, "God has no plan B". My husband had a fit! I was sort of surprised at his indignance. He said in so many words, how wrong that is, because God is the God of second chances. and third, and fourth, and five hundred and fourth. You know what I mean? Yes, He has His perfect will, but I have to tell you, just in case you didn't know...I am not perfect. Nope, not perfect. I've been married almost 37 years and it's not been perfect. My husband hasn't been perfect and I have been messed up and messed up other people. So there.
We've been near divorce a time or two, so believe me. God forgives, heals and restores. I'm living proof!

One other thing I want to say concerning these scriptures, and the other reason they mean alot to me is that Jesus looked at this woman and saw her heart. He had a change of eternity for her, but He also had a job for her. She may have become the first woman "evangelist"! She ran back to town and told all the other townspeople who Jesus was and for them to come and meet Him.

When I was 45 years old, God "called" me. He reached down and gave me a message and said now go tell it. I had this burning in me for months before I finally went to my Pastor and talked to him. The calling was strong, it was life changing and it wasn't going to go away. I won't go into detail, let's just say that I left feeling rejected and insignificant. I know in my heart it would have been different if I had been a man.

It's hard being a woman in the realization of a call to minister. I thank God that He put it in my heart. I'm not dead yet. God's in charge!

I'm so grateful that God has elevated the status of women. It may still be hard, but He knows our hearts and He loves us more than we could ever imagine.

I want this to be affirming, encouraging, and the Truth. We have all sinned in some way or another. I make no judgements. I have been right there with some biggies. We go to God, admit our sin, and then receive forgiveness. Repentance is admission, and then making a decision to turn from sin and go the other way. It all starts with being honest before Him. He will be there for us, no matter what.There is no sin so big that He does not forgive. He wraps His loving arms around us... and how wonderful is that?

Be Blessed,

Just want to mention that if you leave a comment here I will get back with you here. I think that is more in keeping with making this an "interactive" place. If you have something personal, I'm happy to have you email me. It's on my profile. Then I'll return your email. I'm loving hearing from you all. This has been a huge blessing to me. This was tough subject matter. I prayed hard for the right words. God is so loving. If any one of you is ever offended or hurt by anything I say, please let me know, It was not intentional and we'll figure it out. Love you all, and thank you for taking the time to come by!


  1. Hi Debra. All I can say is simply that your words encourage me. I'm certain God has led me to this place at this time. I'm sure each of us is searching for a closer relationship with the Lord. Maybe we have issues we're dealing with or maybe we just want the closeness that comes from studying the word as a group. For me it's both. I could use all your prayers, not for anytime tramatic but just for simply for Gods presence to be felt and heard by me. God must have a plan for me and I pray that I can overcome my fears and learn to let go and let him lead and that I will actually learn to follow without reserve.

    Debra I thank God for your starting this group and my prayers are with you as you lead us. I pray for each of you in this group and that your lives might be blessed. Hugs...Tracy

  2. You'll never know how much this post meant to me. Thank you!

  3. This attitude is always a gift to me. I was divorced at the age of 28, not by my choice. I have three daughters that I raised mostly on my own. I was born again a year or so after my divorce and dated a christian man that had been married very young and divorced in a very short time. We dated for five years off and on because he just could not wrap his mind around remarriage. Well I wanted a husband to spend the rest of my life with and someone to be a father to my then grade school and middle school age daughters. I am remarried now for almost 13 years. I know God loves me and is ok with this marriage because it has been blessed more than I can count. Thanks for the truth.

  4. Hi Debra, thanks for your thoughts today. Please continue! Everyone is at a different point in their lives...some might not be ready to hear your words but if at least one person was touched in a day, it is well worth it.Blessings. Sally

  5. I am sorry that happened with your pastor, I can relate. I have said for years they go to "cemetary" to become pastors...LOL
    We all have a circumference of authority to walk in. He does the work and see's it through to completion.
    Here you have a platform for your faith and love for God and people ...to walk in your God given anointing. Jesus, said offenses will come... it is part of the territory. Just take courage, it is there for the taking. I should take my own advice now shouldn't I.
    Good job.

  6. Always blessed when I stop by...I'm glad your here...I feel comforted by just knowing this.

  7. You and Lee expressed succinctly what I wanted to say, but didn't have the words. I want to add that once we have asked for forgiveness, we are to leave that sin at His feet. We can't dwell on it or worry over it like a dog with a bone. It is forgiven and in the past. That for me seems to be the hardest part. I'll ask for forgiveness over and over, knowing in my heart He's already forgiven me. Am I making sense?

  8. Debbie, you have a great point, thanks for sharing it. That is so hard for me to do. I keep gnawing on it, guess it's guilt. (not good) Sometimes I find myself going to God with things that are ancient history, that I have already dealt with, but that are hard for me to let go. When that happens I hear, "move forward". The Bible says that He "forgets" our past sin, but I frequently want to bring it back up.
    And to everyone, thanks for letting ME be honest today. I never want anyone thinking that I'm "preachy" or that I'm looking "down the nose" at anyone. I'm the first to admit that I am a work in progress!
    You all are such a great inspiration to me.

  9. Hello Everyone-
    Hello Miss Debra-

    I think sometimes we think of honesty as that all important character trait tied to big things in our live- the BIG EVENTS.

    In order to have peace, I have to be, need to be honest all day long in all of the little things.

    That is not always easy because I may lie to avoid hurting feelings, to people please, to take the path of least resistance.

    Remember white lies as a child? What an odd concept now that I think about it.
    Even in the bargain hunting I do, I must be cautious and respect the seller as well.I must ne honest.

    It all goes together, right?


  10. Hey Laura, that's a good one for me. I used to be a much bigger "talker"...er a "blabber", than I am even now. I'm thinking about how it says in James that the tongue is a rudder that sets our path and that it can set on fire a situation. My point being, I would blab so much I found later, that God would remind me that exaggeration was basically lying. Now I'm more careful, and He cured me of it, by having to go to the person and apologize for my big mouth. Honesty is a way of life, just like our faith and trust in God.

  11. I just found your site today. I have been searching for a bible study that was right for me. Your words struck a cord with me. Thank you for your service.

  12. I think that you really got your point across. Well said!

  13. I'm so thankful for the God of "many" chances. Sometimes I think He brings sin and temptations into our lives, just to show us, we are one step away from falling.... without HIM... when we try to live this life on our own, and think we have "arrived", sometimes He reminds us of where we would be without Him. I am speaking from a personal experience.... something I thought would never be an issue for me... something that passed my way recently to show ME that I, too, am very vulnerable to sin and am NOTHING without God!


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