Monday, April 2, 2012

Can we talk?...

I'm still here, just in case you thought I was "backslidden" or some other dreadful thing. I have to laugh, cause, wow, I really hate that word. I've heard it my whole life bandied about by regular churchgoers who describe some poor unfortunate that maybe isn't living up to everyone else's standards. Nope, not backslidden, I've just felt like keeping my mouth shut for awhile while I try to sort out my life. Of course I'm not sure that's very easy for any of us. Cause just when you think things are figured out you can have something hit you from out of the blue and there you are again facing those big ?s.

Actually what I really want to talk about is taking God seriously in the matters of our daily life and then the issue of God's timing. That can be a sore spot for a lot of us, because sometimes His timing feels really OFF. (can I get an AMEN to that?) I just want to share a "case-in-point" in my own life.

So, most of you know I have some heart and cardiovascular problems that are hereditary, but still MY problem no matter where they came from or how I got stuck with them. AND for the last three years I've had to take some (sometimes more, sometimes less) medications that yes, can save your life, but at the same time cause all kinds of other side effects.

I'll be honest here, I'm talking about weight gain and generally having low energy and yada yada yada. Throw in post menopause and I'm not a happy camper in the "look at yourself in the mirror" department. Plus the fact that I'm short so that just compounds the problem. Now, I want to make myself perfectly clear, this isn't just about appearance, but about my overall general health. I'm all for the idea of being happy with ourselves, but I have the added concern (and responsibility) of health. Actually we ALL have that issue. Taking care of our bodies by what we eat goes WAAAAAAY beyond how we view ourselves outwardly, but how we should be answering to God's plan to be and stay healthy.

I've whined to God for the last few years about getting in better shape, but exercise for me is tricky. I have to be careful to not overdo it. A day of physical activity can put me in bed for a day. I have to keep in mind that I need to "strenghen" myself slowly, not wind up in the hospital because my heart has been overtaxed.

And then the next idea is e.a.t.i.n.g. Good grief, I wish it could be more simple. OK, maybe it IS simple and I just hadn't grasped the concept. So, I'm praying and whining and praying and whining, the whole time I know that I need to get some pounds off cause my blood pressure is too high and I have some joints that scream at me any time I try to shop the mall. Not to mention the fact that I've had plenty of conviction to eat more healthily. The only thing I can say is that I was full of excuses. I won't even go there, because there are just too many.

A few weeks ago God woke me up in the morning and said very clearly to me. "Soon you are going to have to make a decision and this time it better be the right one. Your future depends on it." GULP... Can I tell you that that statement put the proverbial "fear of God" into me? My mind started racing as to what the decision actually was and of course my thoughts were not about my eating habits...but more earth shattering possibilities.

I'm going to finish this post in a few days, because I think that God can use just this much to speak to some of you today too. Anybody out there in the same boat with me? It doesn't have to be about "eating". Chances are God has been gently nudging some of us to do His will and we've casually been either ignoring Him or just not taking Him too seriously. Are you feeling it?

If so, you can take this opportunity to be open to what God's about to say...get ready...He might say something you're really needing to hear.

p.s. just want to let you know that you can sign up to receive this blog's current posts in your email. (on the right sidebar) I'm pretty sporadic so it might be an easier way to keep track. 

love in Jesus,


  1. I could echo every single line you have written with only a few substitutions. I joined Weight Watchers online 2 weeks ago and have lost some weight and really need to be vigilant about it. I was very successful in 2009 with the program. I have to exercise in moderation as well. I do a little and rest. It takes me 3 days to cut the grass with a push mower but I get it done. I pray every morning for help and to let the Lord take my mind to healthy food and not sugar. Thank you for this today, it is good to know I am not alone. I shall pray for you daily along the same lines my friend.

  2. Great share/write, Deb. I often wonderful if God hears the whining, or just smiles .... knowing we'll figure it all out/hear Him one way or another.

    I wish you the very best in dealing with all the issues that you are enduring. They aren't easy ... been there, done that ... still here.
    Have a great week ~
    TTFN ~

  3. Oh my, is there a hidden camera in this room? Seems like my body has been taking on a life of its own the past five years. I am only five foot tall and I have about 20 pounds too much on it. Started when I was around 40 with 10 pounds and I would take it off every couple of years..... I quit walking on my treadmill in the last couple of years because I have lower back and hip problems and now a foot that is giving me problems. I do not want to expand anymore, thinking at 54 I need to get healthier but the doctors do not seem to be helping. So I am with you..I need to listen up.

  4. I love it when he speaks clearly like this! I remember a day, many years ago, I was driving my car and God spoke to my inner being...I heard him in my head with my voice, but his words. He said,"Becky, do you realize that you trust the strangers in the cars facing you more than you trust me?" This comment came the day before a year of learning to trust the One who can be trusted. It was a defining moment! I look forward to reading more about your decision.

  5. I'm up at 2:25am, reading your blog, because I am having a "I need to change some things in my life" crisis as well. Aching joints, high blood pressure, low self esteem, endless worry and frustration...blah blah blah. I KNOW what to why don't I? What keeps me going..FAITH! Faith that an all knowing, ever loving God is not done with me yet.

  6. There has been an urgentsy(is that a word?) in my heart for souls. LOST SOULS...GOD has been dealing with me and my heart has been heavy for family, friends and people I don't even know. Do they know GOD? Time is going so fast...People need JESUS..We as christians must do more for his kingdom...that is what GOD and the Holy Spirit is saying to my spirit...

  7. Dear Debra...Oh, my Goodness, did the Lord send you to get through to me? We sound alike. In a nutshell, until 13 years ago I was a little, trim, walking 3 miles a day in-good-shape woman. Then breast cancer (double mastectomies) and aggressive chemo. Thought I was going to die, so might as well eat (+ 75 lbs! Yay!!) Compound all that with metabolic changes, a now-weird thyroid, diabetes (from the weight ~ (eyes rolling)), lost 3 inches in height from osteoporosis (chemo) ~ plus, the newest thing is high blood pressure and the medicine makes me sick as a dog...
    I need to do something quick, and yet, just can't motivate myself.
    Prayers needed! (Plus a swift kick, probably)

  8. Oh, I forgot the post-menopausal thing and low energy...sigh ~ Now following, and will also sign up for e-mail...

  9. I can seriously relate. I had a few dreams that were telling me I needed to take better care of my health...both emotional and physical. Also a very profound dream where I was told to Trust in God!! Those were 'her' emphatic words.

    I like the title of your post. I say it to God all the time, and to Jesus, too. I think Jesus must be the only man that doesn't cringe when he hears a woman say, 'Can we talk?'


  10. can relate so much Debra. I have been on my butt all day today with my swollen knee. In fact, I have been in tears several times this month, wondering if this will be my life know, the "what if's." What if my knee is permanent? What if I can't be physical anymore? What if I am in chronic pain the rest of my life?

    What if, what if, what if?

    And the joke? The real joke?

    The DAY, and I mean the DAY I decided I would finally get back to good eating, and back to exercising again, was the very day I injured my knee....getting off the sofa! Now granted, I had just spent three solid weeks moving, lifting, loading and unloading tons of inventory into a new studio, and on the very LAST day of the move, I was so grateful and I was resting, but I realized how out of shape I had let myself go over the last year, I told myself I would finally stop eating crap and start working out again....then knee gave out and I almost fell to the floor that night and I haven't been able to really walk without great pain since.

    I know it wasn't really getting off the sofa that injured my knee - it was weeks of loading and going up and down steps and so on....but like you, God had been telling me for a while now, that I just can't keep on doing this kind of work - I'm not 20 anymore. I'm sitting here, typing, with a swollen knee, very painful, angry that the doc's are taking so long for the MRI....and wondering what I am to learn...

    When I get it, I will share it. In the meantime, I have learned some really neat stuff on the Internet about food, since I haven't been able to move much. Hulu (on the Internet) has some great documentaries about food and its future that you could watch and motivate you. One that you might enjoy is called Fat, Sick and Nearly Dead. I really found this documentary really interesting and motivating!

    Big hug
    Elizabeth :-)


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